Finally started dreaming again...I haven't had any (or at least remembered any) since I got here. I didn't realize how much I missed having them until I had a few. Nelle & Nick, if you're reading this, I had one about you. I don't remember what happened, but it was a good dream. I'm excited for next semester.
This is bad, because it's only been 3 1/2 weeks, but I'm starting to feel ready to go home. I'm not homesick, and I don't mind being here, but I would be fine heading back in the next week. I don't know where that feeling came from, but it's definitely here. Hopefully it won't persist. I think it's a comfort thing. I am comfortable here, but things aren't convenient. I don't mean pre-packaged, everything perfect convenient, but more just that I know what's going on. I miss the ease of being at home or at school. Knowing how to get places, where I can get a good price on whatever, what is the best reading place, all that sort of stuff. Everything here is still new, and I keep finding different things. It's really cool, and I was enjoying that adventure for the first few weeks, but it's starting to exhaust me. There is no quiet. I don't mean in terms of sound, but in terms of a mental state. I can't go sit in a park, and there are no trees for me to read in. There are times when I find that state of serenity, but it's not as calm or as satisfying as when I get it at home. I always come out of it wanting more.
I think that's part of why I have recently been tired all the time. Every few hours I feel like I need to take a nap. And not a twenty minute nap--an hour or so nap. I sleep from 10:00 to 7:00 every night and wake up not feeling at all rested. Probably part of that is from dehydration or not getting enough exercise and stuff like that, but I think it also comes from not having the kind of mental relaxation that I am used to. I'm not stressed out all the time, but there is no ease. Perhaps it will go away, but I feel like that's just what life is like here. I guess I'll find out.
At some point I will write an entry that is actually about India. You know, the cows, the traffic, the window shopping--the things that I could only write because I am here. But not today. Eventually, just not today.
I hope things are well with everyone...please drop me a line sometime or send me a letter. I miss you all!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Hey everyone,
I don't know haw many people may have heard about this, but yesterday (the 13th) there were five bombings in New Delhi. I am safe, and everyone I know here is. We all got a little shaken up, because two of the bombs went off in a market that we regularly shop at and had even been out to dinner in the night before. They were low-intensity bombs, and the last I heard there was a total of 15 that had been killed, and around a hundred injured. That was last night anyway. Luckily most of the students on our program were in the same area, so we all gathered at one person's house to watch the news and spend the night so we weren't out rickshawing late at night in all the chaos. As luck would have it, our phones all stopped working that morning too, so everyone was going crazy trying to get in touch with the program directors and find out what we should do. Everybody's safe and sound, and tomorrow we have a big meeting at the program center to discuss future safety precautions and stuff. Apparently Storm-ji (academic director) has canceled classes for the next week, so I don't know what that means for the future of the program.
Katz and I got home around 11 this morning, and have spent most of the day with our family. It's been nice being around, since we don't normally see both Deepak and Deepika together because of their shifts at work. Yesterday we finally got to give them their homestay gifts, which was fun. We also went out to lunch with them and Dishant today at a really good Chinese food place. Lots of fun. Dishant has gotten much friendly with Katz & I, which is great. He's adorable.
I haven't been homesick, but I've been thinking a lot about home these last few days. I don't know why, but it's kind of strange. I think it's got to do with knowing that it is going to be completely different when I get back. Both physically (it'll be winter) and mentally. It's going to be strange. I'm not worried about it, but I kind of wish I could go home every few weeks, just so that there was an adjustment. It helps that I can call home occasionally.
Feeling vomity. Not actually vomiting, but nauseous most of the day. Less than pleasant, especially when rickshawing. I haven't been eating anything different that I know of, so maybe it's just that everything is finally hitting me. Ick.
We found an even closer, cheaper internet place. Only about 50 cents and hour, and about a five minute walk. Kind of dirty, but acceptable. It's also right next to a chemist (drugstore) and stationary (office supply stuff), so it's really handy.
I'm getting much more comfortable walking around. There is still a lot of unpleasant staring, but it's more manageable and not as creepy. Now it's just annoying, but it doesn't get to me as much, so it's easier to ignore. It feels really nice to be comfortable though. Not complacent, just comfortable.
Time to go--I have to take a nap and then do some homework for tomorrow. I'm behind since I wasn't around to do any this morning or last night!
I don't know haw many people may have heard about this, but yesterday (the 13th) there were five bombings in New Delhi. I am safe, and everyone I know here is. We all got a little shaken up, because two of the bombs went off in a market that we regularly shop at and had even been out to dinner in the night before. They were low-intensity bombs, and the last I heard there was a total of 15 that had been killed, and around a hundred injured. That was last night anyway. Luckily most of the students on our program were in the same area, so we all gathered at one person's house to watch the news and spend the night so we weren't out rickshawing late at night in all the chaos. As luck would have it, our phones all stopped working that morning too, so everyone was going crazy trying to get in touch with the program directors and find out what we should do. Everybody's safe and sound, and tomorrow we have a big meeting at the program center to discuss future safety precautions and stuff. Apparently Storm-ji (academic director) has canceled classes for the next week, so I don't know what that means for the future of the program.
Katz and I got home around 11 this morning, and have spent most of the day with our family. It's been nice being around, since we don't normally see both Deepak and Deepika together because of their shifts at work. Yesterday we finally got to give them their homestay gifts, which was fun. We also went out to lunch with them and Dishant today at a really good Chinese food place. Lots of fun. Dishant has gotten much friendly with Katz & I, which is great. He's adorable.
I haven't been homesick, but I've been thinking a lot about home these last few days. I don't know why, but it's kind of strange. I think it's got to do with knowing that it is going to be completely different when I get back. Both physically (it'll be winter) and mentally. It's going to be strange. I'm not worried about it, but I kind of wish I could go home every few weeks, just so that there was an adjustment. It helps that I can call home occasionally.
Feeling vomity. Not actually vomiting, but nauseous most of the day. Less than pleasant, especially when rickshawing. I haven't been eating anything different that I know of, so maybe it's just that everything is finally hitting me. Ick.
We found an even closer, cheaper internet place. Only about 50 cents and hour, and about a five minute walk. Kind of dirty, but acceptable. It's also right next to a chemist (drugstore) and stationary (office supply stuff), so it's really handy.
I'm getting much more comfortable walking around. There is still a lot of unpleasant staring, but it's more manageable and not as creepy. Now it's just annoying, but it doesn't get to me as much, so it's easier to ignore. It feels really nice to be comfortable though. Not complacent, just comfortable.
Time to go--I have to take a nap and then do some homework for tomorrow. I'm behind since I wasn't around to do any this morning or last night!
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Good tiimes in India...
Enjoying life here...since I didn't go away this weekend I got to sleep in this morning--so necessary. It was very lovely. Last night a bunch of the girls and I went to see a dance performance at the India International Center. The dancer danced without stopping for at least an hour. No breaks for drink, rest, or anything. And it was a very active dance--my feet hurt just watching all the stopping. She never broke character either. It was pretty awesome.
After we left the concert we walked to Kahn Market and went to Chona's Rest-O-Bar (they call lounges rest-o-bars--it's kind of amusing) for drinks and dinner. It was quite lovely, and nice to just sit an relax. We were in a room by ourselves, so we didn't have to worry about making noise or being silly or being "slutty American girls" because we were out by ourselves. It was nice. I'm really glad I have a roommate, because it means I can go out semi-late at night and not have to worry about getting home.
For practica I am doing Madhubani painting. It's really cool, and I can't stop drawing since we started it. I'm not doing the actual stuff that you are supposed to do, since I don't know all the symbols yet, but it's fun to make up my own designs. Maybe if I can figure out how I'll try and post a picture of one. I need to figure out how to transfer my photos from camera to computer first though.
After we left the concert we walked to Kahn Market and went to Chona's Rest-O-Bar (they call lounges rest-o-bars--it's kind of amusing) for drinks and dinner. It was quite lovely, and nice to just sit an relax. We were in a room by ourselves, so we didn't have to worry about making noise or being silly or being "slutty American girls" because we were out by ourselves. It was nice. I'm really glad I have a roommate, because it means I can go out semi-late at night and not have to worry about getting home.
For practica I am doing Madhubani painting. It's really cool, and I can't stop drawing since we started it. I'm not doing the actual stuff that you are supposed to do, since I don't know all the symbols yet, but it's fun to make up my own designs. Maybe if I can figure out how I'll try and post a picture of one. I need to figure out how to transfer my photos from camera to computer first though.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
so, my mother has informed me that so far my blog entries seem rather negative. That was not intentional. I actually love it here. A lot. I suppose the reason for mentioning all the negative stuff (beggars, pollution, etc.) is that it is what stares you in the face when you get here and travel around. It really is a beautiful and amazing country though. The people on the program (the students from the states and the people here) are really great. My host family is wonderful, I just wish I could spend more time with them. And the clothing and colors are amazing.
Food is spicy. But we got kheer (Indian rice pudding) in Haridwar and it is basically the meaning of my existance. Why can't I eat it everyday for every meal?
So yeah, I do like it here. I can't quite believe that I'm going to be here for another few months. I keep thinking I'll be going home in a week or so.
Still not sick! The rest of the group is dropping like flies though, so it's only a matter of time! I can't wait!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Finally found a decent computer lab! It's kind of dirty and small and dark and dank, but it only costs 40 rupees an hour, which converts to about a dollar. Really good, since this will end up being where I write my papers. And it's only about a 15 minute walk from my house, or a short rickshaw ride.
This past weekend was...interesting. It had some really great, wonderful parts, and some really nasty, awful parts. We left really early to go to Haridwar, a city on the mouth of the Ganges. Because it's the mouth, it is considered extremely holy, and is full of pilgrims and visitors and tourists. Because of all these people, it is also a center for all the beggars, cripples, and decrepit people from that area to come and beg and cheat everyone else. It is such a game of manipulation, and is really disgusting. I had a young, decent-looking girl come up to me, quickly dab paint on my forehead, and bless me. She did this without giving me a chance to say okay. Then she asked for money for blessing me. It was disgusting. Everything about it just was. So many people playing off of the fact that it is a holy place filled with people eager to wash away their sins and doing everything they can to get money off of you. The fact that we were a crowd of white kids didn't help.
We left Haridwar early on Sunday and took a (very sketchy) bus ride to Rishikesh, about an hour north. It's in the foothills of the Himalayas, and is (I think) the yoga capitol of India. I think it's also where the Beatles went. While it was still rather touristy--I've never seen so many European-looking hippy people--it was not overwhelmingly so, and was actually very calming. There are lots of ashrams and such where people have come from all over to meditate and relax. There was some begging, but not nearly as much. It was very nice to be able to stand in one spot for more than five minutes without a child pulling on your kamiz or a man with no legs tapping on your shoes. I enjoyed sitting at a cafe overlooking the mountains and river and just sketching pictures while having a sign-language conversation with a little Indian girl who wanted me to draw her pictures.
Then we left, only to fall into more manipulation. We missed our bus back to Haridwar by about 5 seconds, and had to take two rickshaws on the hour long drive back. Bad plan. We paid a little more than we should have, but we were comfortable in our two six-person rickshaws, divided in half. We got part way there when they pulled over, made us all get out, told us there was a police barricade ahead and that we'd all have to get into one 8-person rickshaw. Bullshit. Lots of difficulty translating, since only two people in our group are in intermediate Hindi, and they have difficulty with it too. We crammed all of our large backpacks and our 11 bodies into the van, which then was driven the rest of the way by a boy who looked to be about 12 years old. We paid 250 rupees instead of the 6o0 they asked, and proceeded to be followed around by the boy cussing us out loudly in Hindi and a crowd of people who were just there to watch. We made our train on time, but everyone felt pretty shitty about the whole thing. The fact that they so blatantly tried to dupe us, just because we were young white kids made everybody so angry. And yes, the boy will probably be beaten when he gets back without the expected amount of money, but we couldn't help that. We couldn't let them get away with it and continue to feed the system. It really works on your hope for humanity. This weekend was pretty trying in that sense...
But it was a decent weekend, and I am glad we did it. It felt really good to get out of Delhi for awhile, and breath ever-so-slightly cleaner air. The mountains were pretty, and it was nice to have some time with the group when we weren't studying or talking about class.
Some people are making plans to go on a trip again this weekend, but I don't think I will. I want to hang out with my host family some, since I don't usually get to see my host-mom (she works nights, so I only see her in the morning for breakfast). I think I'll do a little shopping, and maybe try and see some theater. I'll at least go see some awful bollywood film with my friends. Maybe explore Old Delhi. We'll see. I want to stay here though, and not spend quite as much money on traveling.
Time to go work on Hindi. It's coming along, but getting harder. Our host family speaks perfect English, so there isn't much incentive to practice it at home.
Oh, I'm also taking Madhubani painting as a practica, which is really cool. It's this neat style of really simple drawing that is extremely intricate--if that makes sense. It doesn't call for perfection, which is what makes it really nice. Lines aren't straight, circles aren't perfect, but it still looks amazing. I can't really explain it. Look it up online...it's beautiful.
Okay, actually going now. Please email or comment--I miss everyone!
This past weekend was...interesting. It had some really great, wonderful parts, and some really nasty, awful parts. We left really early to go to Haridwar, a city on the mouth of the Ganges. Because it's the mouth, it is considered extremely holy, and is full of pilgrims and visitors and tourists. Because of all these people, it is also a center for all the beggars, cripples, and decrepit people from that area to come and beg and cheat everyone else. It is such a game of manipulation, and is really disgusting. I had a young, decent-looking girl come up to me, quickly dab paint on my forehead, and bless me. She did this without giving me a chance to say okay. Then she asked for money for blessing me. It was disgusting. Everything about it just was. So many people playing off of the fact that it is a holy place filled with people eager to wash away their sins and doing everything they can to get money off of you. The fact that we were a crowd of white kids didn't help.
We left Haridwar early on Sunday and took a (very sketchy) bus ride to Rishikesh, about an hour north. It's in the foothills of the Himalayas, and is (I think) the yoga capitol of India. I think it's also where the Beatles went. While it was still rather touristy--I've never seen so many European-looking hippy people--it was not overwhelmingly so, and was actually very calming. There are lots of ashrams and such where people have come from all over to meditate and relax. There was some begging, but not nearly as much. It was very nice to be able to stand in one spot for more than five minutes without a child pulling on your kamiz or a man with no legs tapping on your shoes. I enjoyed sitting at a cafe overlooking the mountains and river and just sketching pictures while having a sign-language conversation with a little Indian girl who wanted me to draw her pictures.
Then we left, only to fall into more manipulation. We missed our bus back to Haridwar by about 5 seconds, and had to take two rickshaws on the hour long drive back. Bad plan. We paid a little more than we should have, but we were comfortable in our two six-person rickshaws, divided in half. We got part way there when they pulled over, made us all get out, told us there was a police barricade ahead and that we'd all have to get into one 8-person rickshaw. Bullshit. Lots of difficulty translating, since only two people in our group are in intermediate Hindi, and they have difficulty with it too. We crammed all of our large backpacks and our 11 bodies into the van, which then was driven the rest of the way by a boy who looked to be about 12 years old. We paid 250 rupees instead of the 6o0 they asked, and proceeded to be followed around by the boy cussing us out loudly in Hindi and a crowd of people who were just there to watch. We made our train on time, but everyone felt pretty shitty about the whole thing. The fact that they so blatantly tried to dupe us, just because we were young white kids made everybody so angry. And yes, the boy will probably be beaten when he gets back without the expected amount of money, but we couldn't help that. We couldn't let them get away with it and continue to feed the system. It really works on your hope for humanity. This weekend was pretty trying in that sense...
But it was a decent weekend, and I am glad we did it. It felt really good to get out of Delhi for awhile, and breath ever-so-slightly cleaner air. The mountains were pretty, and it was nice to have some time with the group when we weren't studying or talking about class.
Some people are making plans to go on a trip again this weekend, but I don't think I will. I want to hang out with my host family some, since I don't usually get to see my host-mom (she works nights, so I only see her in the morning for breakfast). I think I'll do a little shopping, and maybe try and see some theater. I'll at least go see some awful bollywood film with my friends. Maybe explore Old Delhi. We'll see. I want to stay here though, and not spend quite as much money on traveling.
Time to go work on Hindi. It's coming along, but getting harder. Our host family speaks perfect English, so there isn't much incentive to practice it at home.
Oh, I'm also taking Madhubani painting as a practica, which is really cool. It's this neat style of really simple drawing that is extremely intricate--if that makes sense. It doesn't call for perfection, which is what makes it really nice. Lines aren't straight, circles aren't perfect, but it still looks amazing. I can't really explain it. Look it up online...it's beautiful.
Okay, actually going now. Please email or comment--I miss everyone!
Friday, September 5, 2008
finally a real entry!
Namaste!
So, I finally have the chance to write a slightly longer message—about time right? I guess it hasn’t actually been that long, but since two days here feels like a month, two weeks feels like another life to me!
It has been going very well. The first week we stayed in an ashram that was very peaceful and quiet, and we all were together, so it really felt a bit like a summer camp. It was good for easing us into the whirlwind that is India. On our first full day we had a drop-of—they split us into groups of six or seven, took us to a neighborhood with a list of things to find out, and left us there. It was terrifying, but really good. It feels like such a long time ago already.
I’ve been going around on my own a decent amount, so I’m fairly comfortable with the system. Rickshaws are amazing. The most terrifying experience if you’ve never done it before, but once you get the hang of it it is rather fun. The driving is, by American standards, a nightmare, but there are surprisingly few accidents. That I’ve seen anyway. Nobody drives super fast, so even the accidents that do happen don’t seem too bad. Yesterday my rickshaw rear-ended another one, and I got bumped forward a bit, but we were already so close that we couldn’t have done anything too badly.
It can be a little eerie taking the rickshaws by yourself, but you just have to be very no-nonsense about it. The day before last my driver was asking me about America, which was fine, but then he asked me if I was married. I just glared at him, put on an “American Businesswoman” attitude, and looked away. He shut up real fast.
My homestay family is really great. I’m with the daughter and son-in-law of our dear sweet wonderful Hindi teacher, and their four-year-old son. They are in their thirties, so åit doesn’t really feel like I’m with parents, but they are so nice and really friendly. They’re also fairly “modern” people, so they don’t mind if we wear tanktops around the house or don’t use formal Hindi greetings. And our host-dad said they would take us to a nightclub if we wanted to go. He used to be a bartender, so they don’t have strong objections to alcohol, like a lot of the rest of the country does.
This weekend I am going with a group of people to a village at the mouth of the Ganges—I think it’s called Haridwar, but I’m not really sure. It’ll be nice to get out of the city for a bit. The air here is awful. I’ve been using my handkerchiefs and dupattas (an Indian scarf) to cover my mouth and nose whenever we go by rickshaw, since we spend so much time just sitting in stopped traffic inhaling the fumes. It’s icky.
I have to go now. I’ve got some studying to do, and some of my friends and I might go to Old Delhi this afternoon. So far we’ve only been in the southern end of the city. I can’t get over how huge this place is. And intense. I also can’t get over how used I am to parts of it. It doesn’t seem quite right that I’m already a pro at completely ignoring the beggar children that come and cry at the rickshaws (it’s all manipulating—they’re being pimped out by a ‘beggar king’ who usually drugs them and dresses them to look more pathetic), I don’t mind haggling with the rickshaw drivers, and I’ve already gotten much better at avoiding eye contact with any man or boy, since it will automatically be taken as a come-on. Having blue-eyes and white skin is a dream here, but if you do have it the attention it earns you is not particularly pleasant. It can be very disconcerting to walk down a street and have everyone (mostly men) blatantly stare at you in a very…inappropriate way. The staring is unavoidable, but we do everything we can to prevent anything else from happening. We are all dressed as “proper Indian girls”, behave politely, and have a handful of phrases memorized in Hindi to ward off any lasciviousness. So no worrying allowed from anyone ☺ If I’m not worrying, and I’m the closest to the threat, none of you are allowed to worry more!
But I really do need to go now. This has been quite long enough! And I’m impressed if anyone has read all of it. Way to go you! Bahot achha—Very good!
Love to everyone!
So, I finally have the chance to write a slightly longer message—about time right? I guess it hasn’t actually been that long, but since two days here feels like a month, two weeks feels like another life to me!
It has been going very well. The first week we stayed in an ashram that was very peaceful and quiet, and we all were together, so it really felt a bit like a summer camp. It was good for easing us into the whirlwind that is India. On our first full day we had a drop-of—they split us into groups of six or seven, took us to a neighborhood with a list of things to find out, and left us there. It was terrifying, but really good. It feels like such a long time ago already.
I’ve been going around on my own a decent amount, so I’m fairly comfortable with the system. Rickshaws are amazing. The most terrifying experience if you’ve never done it before, but once you get the hang of it it is rather fun. The driving is, by American standards, a nightmare, but there are surprisingly few accidents. That I’ve seen anyway. Nobody drives super fast, so even the accidents that do happen don’t seem too bad. Yesterday my rickshaw rear-ended another one, and I got bumped forward a bit, but we were already so close that we couldn’t have done anything too badly.
It can be a little eerie taking the rickshaws by yourself, but you just have to be very no-nonsense about it. The day before last my driver was asking me about America, which was fine, but then he asked me if I was married. I just glared at him, put on an “American Businesswoman” attitude, and looked away. He shut up real fast.
My homestay family is really great. I’m with the daughter and son-in-law of our dear sweet wonderful Hindi teacher, and their four-year-old son. They are in their thirties, so åit doesn’t really feel like I’m with parents, but they are so nice and really friendly. They’re also fairly “modern” people, so they don’t mind if we wear tanktops around the house or don’t use formal Hindi greetings. And our host-dad said they would take us to a nightclub if we wanted to go. He used to be a bartender, so they don’t have strong objections to alcohol, like a lot of the rest of the country does.
This weekend I am going with a group of people to a village at the mouth of the Ganges—I think it’s called Haridwar, but I’m not really sure. It’ll be nice to get out of the city for a bit. The air here is awful. I’ve been using my handkerchiefs and dupattas (an Indian scarf) to cover my mouth and nose whenever we go by rickshaw, since we spend so much time just sitting in stopped traffic inhaling the fumes. It’s icky.
I have to go now. I’ve got some studying to do, and some of my friends and I might go to Old Delhi this afternoon. So far we’ve only been in the southern end of the city. I can’t get over how huge this place is. And intense. I also can’t get over how used I am to parts of it. It doesn’t seem quite right that I’m already a pro at completely ignoring the beggar children that come and cry at the rickshaws (it’s all manipulating—they’re being pimped out by a ‘beggar king’ who usually drugs them and dresses them to look more pathetic), I don’t mind haggling with the rickshaw drivers, and I’ve already gotten much better at avoiding eye contact with any man or boy, since it will automatically be taken as a come-on. Having blue-eyes and white skin is a dream here, but if you do have it the attention it earns you is not particularly pleasant. It can be very disconcerting to walk down a street and have everyone (mostly men) blatantly stare at you in a very…inappropriate way. The staring is unavoidable, but we do everything we can to prevent anything else from happening. We are all dressed as “proper Indian girls”, behave politely, and have a handful of phrases memorized in Hindi to ward off any lasciviousness. So no worrying allowed from anyone ☺ If I’m not worrying, and I’m the closest to the threat, none of you are allowed to worry more!
But I really do need to go now. This has been quite long enough! And I’m impressed if anyone has read all of it. Way to go you! Bahot achha—Very good!
Love to everyone!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
hey everyone, just letting y'all know that I am still alive. I only have a few minutes at the school computer before we have a sitar workshop...
Everything is wonderful. I haven't gotten sick yet, although Delhi Belly is a constant threat. I'm a pro at bucket showers--they're actually quite soothing. I'm glad I have short hair though!
Hindi is coming along decently. Sentances and words are okay, we'll see what happens when we get to grammar though!
Okay, have to run. I just found a cheap internet place near my homestay house, so hopefully I'll be able to get on soon and actually write a real entry!
Love to everyone!
Everything is wonderful. I haven't gotten sick yet, although Delhi Belly is a constant threat. I'm a pro at bucket showers--they're actually quite soothing. I'm glad I have short hair though!
Hindi is coming along decently. Sentances and words are okay, we'll see what happens when we get to grammar though!
Okay, have to run. I just found a cheap internet place near my homestay house, so hopefully I'll be able to get on soon and actually write a real entry!
Love to everyone!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)